The Presidency -- Just Another Perk

Michael Moore


Dear Governor and President-in-Waiting Bush:

This has to be the first time in our history that a candidate who is losing BOTH the popular vote AND the electoral vote insists on being anointed President of the United States.

I can understand why you expect this title to be yours. You have spent your entire life having everything handed to you. You have never had to earn your place. Money and name alone have opened every door for you. Without effort or hard work or intelligence or ingenuity, you have been bequeathed a life of privilege.

You learned at an early age that, in America, all someone like you has to do is show up. You found yourself admitted to a wealthy New England boarding school simply because your name was Bush. You did not have to EARN your place there. It was bought for you.

You then learned you could get into Yale with a "C" average. Other, more deserving, students who had worked hard for 12 years to earn their place at Yale were denied admittance. You got in because your name was Bush.

You got into Harvard the same way. After screwing off during your four years at Yale -- and maintaining your "C" average -- you took someone's else's seat at Harvard, a seat that they had EARNED.

You then pretended to serve a full stint in the Texas Air National Guard. But one day, according to the Boston Globe, you just skipped out and didn't report back for a year and a half to your unit. You didn't have to earn your military record because your name was Bush.

After a number of "lost years" that don't appear in your official biography, you were given job after job by your daddy and other family members -- jobs you didn't have to earn. No matter how many of your business ventures failed, there was always another one waiting to be handed to you. Finally, you got to be a partner in a ball team -- another gift -- even though you put up only 1/100 of the money for the team. And then you convinced the taxpayers of Arlington, Texas, to give you another perk -- a brand-new multi-million dollar stadium.

So it is no wonder to me why you think you deserve to be named President.  You've haven't earned it or won it -- therefore it must be yours!

And you see nothing wrong with this.

Why should you? It is the only life you have ever known.

I will never forget the footage of you sitting in your governor's mansion the night of the election when it was first declared that Gore had won Florida. Surrounded by poppy and mommy, and on the phone to your brother the governor of Florida, you were a picture of calm. You had not a worry in the world. You told the press that your brother had assured you Florida was yours. If a Bush said it was so, it was so. 

But it ain't so. And when it dawned on you that the Presidency had to be earned and won by a vote of the people -- yes, the people! -- you went berserk. You sent in hatchet man James Baker ("F--- the Jews, they don't vote for us anyway" was his advice to Poppy in '92) to tell lies to the American people and stoke the nation's fears. When that didn't work, you went to federal court and sued to stop the votes from being counted because you knew how the vote would turn out. 

What kills me is how you have turned to the big, bad, federal government for help! Was not your mantra, during every campaign stop, the following line: 

"My opponent trusts the federal government. I TRUST YOU, THE PEOPLE!"

So now we learn the truth. You don't trust the people at all. You went running to the FEDERAL court to get your handout ("Trust the machines, not the people," you pleaded). But the judge didn't buy it, and for perhaps the first time in your life, someone said "no" to you.

What will you do now? According to the New York Times, 90% of your campaign funds came from just 775 American millionaires. Oh, that they could bail you out of this mess! I wouldn't count on them -- it's not like they have suffered financially under Clinton/Gore. They know they will do just fine with the Kissin' Fool. I think, my friend, you are on your own.

Mr. Bush, your only hope is that Gore will wimp out and throw in the towel. There is ample evidence of how Democrats love to cave. You and your right-wing friends know the Democrats are weak-kneed and spineless. You remember how Al Gore and all the Democrats voted to put that anti-abortion zealot Scalia on the Supreme Court -- and how 11 Democrats made the difference in placing Clarence Thomas there, too? 

That's your ticket. Spook Gore and his party into believing a focus group is mad at them, take a phony poll that backs that up, get the gasbag pundits to yammer and hammer him and maybe, just maybe, you'll get the latest plum prize that is not yours to have.


Michael Moore